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Self-conceit.... self-realization....

This is man's worst enemy, that self-conceit does not leave him, for he is then as it were without self-realization.... He sees himself in a false light and therefore does nothing but exalt it instead of humbly calling himself to account, recognizing his faults and shortcomings and combating them. Every striving for perfection must be preceded by realization, but he who sees himself in the mirror of righteousness and inviolability does not strive upwards but thinks he is already at the top; he also has no desire for higher development because he does not realize his inadequate state of maturity. And he will also rarely accept a hint in this respect since he is aware of his value and is therefore extremely distant from truly recognizing the state of his soul. And so it will be very difficult to make the necessity of striving for perfection clear to a person who is convinced of the value of his personality, for he will always find this appropriate in his fellow human beings but never in himself.... He does not regocnize his own greatest fault and therefore finds it difficult to find the path to knowledge.... he has a certain excessive sense of self that prevents him from humbly entrusting himself to the father in heaven, and so this sense of self is the greatest enemy of his soul.... he does not bow before the father.... and much less does he serve.... And this prevents him from developing his soul higher, for a person cannot achieve anything high if he does not consciously strive for it.... and again he will not strive for something he believes he possesses. Only those who think they are small and weak ask for help.... But the great and strong do not think they need it. And so he comes away empty-handed and ultimately has no ascent to expect, because every height must be striven for. If a person's sense of self is so strongly developed, then the distance from the eternal deity is not quite understandable to him, and he does nothing to reduce this distance.... On the contrary, he still allows the earthly world to have an effect on him so that the distance from God becomes ever more noticeable, for he believes himself to be so knowledgeable that he rejects everything offered to him for the salvation of his soul as superior, always starting from the point of view of his inviolability and his value. He regards himself as exemplary and does not want to accept anyone else, he does not accept any teachings and continues to reject them if a transformation of his nature is demanded of him, for this seems to him to be superior to everything and yet is the greatest obstacle on the path to true realization, for only he who believes himself to be in the deepest depths can attain the heights.... for the latter sincerely asks God for His help, which is lovingly granted to him by the father, whereas the latter does not believe himself to be so needy as to ask for the father's help and therefore cannot ascend without any help....

Amen

DOMIŠLJAVOST.... SAMOSPOZNANJE....

Človekov najtrdovratnejši sovražnik je to, da ga ne zapusti domišljavost (prevzetnost), ker je on potem enak, kot da je brez samospoznanja.... On se vidi na napačni luči (svetlobi, spo-znanju), zaradi česar tudi ne stori ničesar, razen da jo še bolj povečuje, namesto da bi se v vsej ponižnosti preveril, da bi spoznal svoje napake in pomanjkljivosti ter da bi se boril proti njih.

Pred vsakotežnjo k izpopolnjevanju mora (najprej) priti spoznanje. Toda vsak, ki se gleda v ogledalu pravičnosti in nedotakljivosti, ta niti ne teži k navzgor, temveč si umišlja, da je že tam; on niti nima potrebe, da bi se razvijal navzgor, ker ni ozaveščen o stanju zrelosti. In on bo le redko sprejel napotilo in opozorilo glede tega, ker je prepričan v svojo pomembnost in se zato nahaja v ogromni oddaljenosti od resničnega spoznanja svojega duševnega stanja.

Tako da bo človeku, ki je prepričan v pomembnost svoje osebnosti, zelo težko mogoče razložiti nujnost izpopolnjevanja, ker bo on vedno mnenja, da je to primerno za njegove bližnje, toda nikoli za njega samega.... On ne spozna svoje lastne največje napake,zaradi česar tako težko najde pot do spoznanja.... On ima nek preveč visok občutek za sebe (previskoko mnenje o sebi), ki mu preprečuje, da bi se v molitvi ponižno prepustil Očetu na nebu, tako da je ta občutek za samega sebe največji sovražnik njegove duše.... on se ne podredi Očetu.... še manj pa služi....

To pa preprečuje razvoj njegove duše na višje, ker človek ne more doseči ničesar, kar jevzvišeno, če ne stremi k temu.... po drugi strani pa ravno ne bo stremel k nečemu, kar verjame, da (že) ima. Samo tisti, ki se ima za majhnega in slabotnega, moli za pomoč.... Toda velik in močan verjame, da le te ne potrebuje. Tako ostaja prazen in končno tudi ne beleži vzpona (napredka), ker je za vsak vzpon potrebna težnja.

Ko je v človeku tako zelo močno razvit občutek za samega sebe, potem tudi ne more pravilno dojeti oddaljenosti od Večnega Božanstva; in on ne stori ničesar, da bi to oddaljenost zmanjšal.... Temu nasprotno pa on dovoljuje, da zemeljski svet vpliva nanj tako, da oddaljenost od Boga postaja vse bolj vidna; on namreč verjame, da ima on osebno tako globoko znanje, da v premoči zavrača vse, kar mu je ponujeno za odrešenje duše, pri čemer pa vedno predpostavlja svojo nedotakljivost in svojo pomembnost.

On se ima za vzornega in ne dovoli, da bi bil kdorkoli drugi vreden. On ne sprejema učenja in odbija, če se od njega zahteva sprememba njegovega bitja. Njemu se namreč zdi, da je to nemogoče doseči, zopet pa je to zanj največja ovira na poti do pravilnega spoznanja, ker do višine lahko pride le tisti, ki verjame, da je najnižji (najmanjši, najšibkejši).... ta namreč iskreno prosi Boga za Njegovo pomoč, katera mu je z Ljubeznijo dana s strani Očeta, medtem ko tisti drugi zase misli, da ni toliko v potrebi, da bi moral prositi za Očetovo pomoč; in tako brez kakršnekoli pomoči niti ne more prispeti gor....

AMEN